Soft and Strong

Today I happened to be in the household aisle of the supermarket - a cornucopia of domesticity which I visit with alarming frequency. I swept down it with my trolley, confidently plucking my soft and strong, pure white, 2-ply loo roll from the shelf. The woman nearest me must have noticed my omniscient approach to the range of lavatorial goods the supermarket offered because she stopped me in my tracks and asked if I recommended that particular brand. I was momentarily taken aback, not yet fully accustomed to antipodean familiarity, despite having lived in Australia for 18 months. I mumbled something in the affirmative, hoping to move on quickly to the laundry detergent shelf but she pressed me for details. Was it very thick? I stopped. Clearly this was going to take some time.

"Yes", I replied, casting my mind back to the last time I had used it, but reluctant to expand on the subject further with a complete stranger.

"Because I don't want it too thick - my toilet blocks very easily," she added. Reeling slightly from the image that statement conjured up, I hastily assured her that it was just right - being not as thick as the quilted and embossed luxury brand to our right, but thicker and therefore more effective than the thin and papery recycled brand to our left (though less environmentally-friendly, it has to be said).

After a bit more reassurance, I eventually left her looking at them all, stroking her chin in thought. I hope she was happy with her decision.